Couplets for my good pal Jesus

Jesus is not my copilot 

But he did give me an Uber ride tonight.
Jesus would take the wheel 

If he weren’t already driving. 
Jesus was born more than two thousand years ago 

And he can drive stick. 
Jesus can turn water into wine 

But he can’t turn left on a busy street. 
Jesus was a nice guy 

He offered to smoke pot with me in my hotel room. 

I politely declined. 
Jesus suffers from long refractory periods

Guess there won’t be a second coming. 

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